HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

 

          Fifty-eight years ago this evening, John and I became husband and wife. He’s not here to celebrate with me and I miss his presence deeply on this particular day. It is a number we would have celebrated together with cards, dinner, drinks and physical afffection.

          Yesterday was the fifth anniversary of his passing. I had told him that day it was okay to move ahead and go beyond to join my father and those he loved who went before. Our son, AJ, did a masterful job of remembering and celebrating his father and his family and I was touched and pleased that he wanted me to publish it on Facebook.

          I remember being so young and so in love that the thought, the very idea of days like yesterday and today weren’t even on my personal horizon. I’m still amazed at how quickly all those years passed. It doesn’t seem all that long ago the two of us were just beginning our journey together. Looking back, it’s true we had our difficult times, but the good times, the good memories far outweigh any negativity that visited and that negativity was always on a temporary basis.

          Just yesterday our granddaughter, Haley, asked me for some examples of her Pa’s handwriting. I thought perhaps she was going to weld me a sign that said, “I love you, John,” but no, she wants to have a tattoo on her body with her Pa’s name. In the process of looking for a good example, I pulled out of the closet the three big shoeboxes of cards we gave each other, our sons and the cards our sons, granddaughter and friends gave us.

          I spent yesterday afternoon on a trip down memory lane. My dining room table is currently a big mess that spills over onto the kitchen counter. I decided as I went through all those cards that I would return to our children and grandchildren the cards they bestowed over all those years. And, in the process, I found a few gems I thought had already been passed on. To AJ will go the pictograph letters his dad sent him from Naknek Alaska in 1977. To Thor will go the teapot shaped card he gave me with a Stash Peppermint Herb Teabag still in its wrapper with a little rhyme that says, "...I'll try my best in every way, but when you get upset with me, relax and have a pot of tea. 

          In all these cards I also found ones that friends had given both John and I. In some cases, I am thinking about putting them in an envelope and returning them with a thank you for the love and affection provided when the card was given, but also the love and affection and great memories they provided this, the second time. I wonder if those recipients will be pleased with this gift.

          It is my hope our children, grandchildren and friends will enjoy looking at these pieces from our pasts. I hope it reminds them of the love we held/hold for each other. My journey yesterday brought some tears, but more than anything else, a tremendous feeling of being surrounded by love throughout our entire pasts right up through the typing of this blog.