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I guess it’s a good thing I’m doing this blog mostly for my own enjoyment as well as an effort to put some form of stability or routine in my life. It also might be an effort to see just how badly my memory is doing…or good. I’m sure you’d like to know what brought this revelation to light.
Just the other
day…and maybe many other days…I was trying to tell a story about something that
happened in my life. As I was recalling and telling, I realized I wasn’t sure
about the information I was sharing. Did it happen then? Did it happen like
that? Was I mixing up that story with another story? Ah, who the hell knows…I
certainly didn’t seem to. So, I gave up telling the story, but it made me more
aware of what’s happening in my head…or not happening.
Should I be overly concerned about this lapse…and others I’ve had/am having? I’m not exactly sure. I do know my own name, where I live, how to get about the streets of my community (and beyond), my financial information, and tons of other information necessary for day-to-day life. It’s the past information I seem to be having a hard time accessing, recalling, or sharing.
I always
thought that as I aged, my memories of long ago would become sharper and
clearer rather than not, at least that’s what I’d always heard. And yes, there
are definitely memories from my past that remain clear and that I could share
without missing a beat.
So, I guess I’ll
choose to not worry about those momentary…or longer…lapses in memory. I guess
as long as the important memories remain fresh and available, there’s no need
to worry. Rather, when I can’t recall my name, address, bank account and fail
to pay my bills, eat, shop, all the normal daily activities, then I should
worry…or will the ability to worry leave as well…I certainly hope so because I
don’t think I want to know when someone else steps in to run my life.
Think I’ll take
a lesson from Alfred E. Neuman…”What, me worry?”