Apologies, dear readers, for leaving this space blank for so long. My life has been a bit of a challenge and may, for all I know, continue to be one for some time.
I had cataract surgery just over a week ago and my eyes seem to be doing just fine. I opted for the distance lenses as opposed to being able to see near. I’ll either need new glasses or continue with the readers I purchased the other day. I was told not to wear my old glasses at all and my appointment for new glasses isn’t until the end of the month.
The
ophthalmologist told me my cataracts were very dense, and I guess they were
because everything is so very BRIGHT. My son called to check on me a couple
hours after he brought me home. I was in bed with the blind pulled down almost
all the way, and what I could see was very bright. I told him he should go out
for a walk and he said he wasn’t doing that in the pouring down rain. I said it
must be sunshining at my house and he responded that he lived in a convergence
zone. Later, when I got up, it was still very bright and pouring down rain. It took
me several hours to realize that the brightness was because I was actually
seeing through a clean, unobstructed lens. So, that’s out of the way now.
Someone
told me that using a ten-year-old computer was tantamount to driving a car
until the brakes failed. So, I ordered a new computer. Well, that’s led to
hours of frustration on my part, even with the assistance of two other people.
Finally, most of the files and photos have been transferred, but unfortunately,
there are files that did not get transferred. I cannot go back for them because
I wiped the old computer’s hard drive, so there’s nothing else to bring over.
What
this means is that I lose the list of “favorite” links on my internet browser
and all the other file folders that were located in Outlook. I’m going to have
to recreate new links and new folders. I tried for a new folder this morning in Outlook and wasn’t allowed to make one, so I’ll have to research how that gets done. Of
course, this new computer has all the latest programs and that’s going to be a
new learning experience…one I’d just as soon not have to have. And, I know,
learning new things at my age is good for my brain…seriously, my brain is tired
and would prefer not to have to learn anything new. I guess I’ll just have to
persevere and learn by the seat of my pants which is how I’ve always had to learn
my computer stuff.
If
all this isn’t enough, my furnace has been acting up. It was installed in 2001,
and my son, the HVAC guy, has been keeping it running. I thought for sure
Easter Sunday that it was done for good. AJ came over and changed out some
parts and brought it back online. On Tuesday, he had to come back because it
stopped again, and once again, he brought it online. I’ve discovered that the
furnace comes on first thing in the morning and brings the house up to temp.
Then it stops and doesn’t come back on until the temperature reaches 63
degrees. So, if I want a shower, I’d best do it first thing or wait until it
kicks on again a few hours later.
This
problem brings up the question of whether I want to invest in a new furnace
and/or a heat pump. AJ also thinks I need to have all the ductwork both under
the house and in the attic replaced as well. I haven’t yet investigated to see
what the cost would be or whether there is a program for poor seniors that
would help with the cost. That’s on my todo list. I hate to invest thousands of
dollars in this house because I’m sure whoever buys it will simply tear it down
and build something else or a couple of small houses. Not just because of the
furnace, but because it’s going to need a new roof fairly soon and the south
foundation has sunk four inches…I got a price for that about four years ago and
it was $39,000.
So,
is it time for me to sell this place and look for something smaller? I don’t
know. Just thinking about that had me in tears this morning. I’ve been here for
fifty-seven years and my home is full of STUFF that has meaning for me. How do
I downsize and eliminate stuff that has meaning for me. There’s no way I could
take it all because it wouldn’t fit in a smaller place. Just typing this and
thinking about how hard it would be to
move brings tears to my eyes. It seems like it would be so much easier if I
could just stop, quit, give up, enter the great beyond, join John and all those
that have gone before me. And, don’t assume from that sentence that I plan to
off myself because that’s not a choice I could make…at least at this point;
maybe if I were terminally ill. I’m just alone and terminally poor.
Anyway,
please excuse the pity party I’ve been having for myself. I have two chapters
to write about Madeleine and that book will be finished. I promise I’ll get
them done very soon. The words are all in my head and I just need to send them
out my fingers. Then, maybe I’ll check with amazon and see about getting these
books of mine published. Even if I didn’t make any money, the idea that what I’ve
written is available for purchase would be a huge plus for me.
So,
those are my excuses for being absent for so long. Do hope you’ve missed me, or
at least missed Madeleine…still looking for a title for this one.