RELEVATIONS???

          

 About twenty-five years ago, I had a revelation that I seriously wish had entered my life decades earlier. I realized it was my choice each and every morning as to how my day was going to progress. I could choose to make my lips turn up in a smile for each and every person I met that day, as well as myself, and respond to friendly inquiries with positive replies. Or I could choose to fret and worry most of my day and push people away with all that negativity. I now sometimes wonder how different my life might have been had I chosen the positive path rather than the negative which, in review seemed to have been my default setting for most of my life.

Now, I’m not saying I manage to make the positive choice every morning when I look in the mirror, but percentage-wise it has become my first choice no matter what is going on in my life. Even now, more than a couple decades later, I usually choose the positive path for my day and work very hard to be optimistic about everything.

Just recently, I had another revelation that I’m pondering and trying to decide how it does or will truly affect my life as I continue to age. That revelation has to do with the fact that no one, aside from my dog, relies on me for absolutely anything. Yes, I have family and friends, but their lives would continue whether or not mine would.

I’ve also found myself wondering about my available choices when complications and tribulations reach a point where they become overwhelming. When does that point arise? When will I need to make a choice as to whether I want to continue to slog through the days, weeks, moths, maybe even years ahead? How bad does the physical and/or emotional pain have to become before I want to wave the white flag of surrender. I won’t know the answer to that until I have that white flag in hand and who knows when that will occur.

Don’t ask me why I’m making this blog post. I have no idea. It’s simply something I began writing about several years ago and just found on my computer. Even though there’s nothing major on the horizon that would lead me to change how or where I’m living I feel what I wrote then is still relevant to me today…I guess that’s why.