GRATEFULNESS

             For a couple of days, I was fairly miserable and gave serious consideration to just quitting this blog. Then, I realized I was looking at it from the glass half empty view rather than the glass half full. So, I’ve adjusted my attitude because I’m the only one that can actually do that.

          A year ago this coming Christmas, at least I think it was a Christmas gift, a friend gave me a book about being grateful. There were 365 reasons or explanations for why I should be grateful, one for each day of the year. I faithfully followed this book and each and every night, I wrote down five reasons why I was thankful for that very day. It wasn’t all that difficult, although there were days when I had to really concentrate hard to find something for which I was grateful.

          Then, I knew someone who was having a very difficult time. She’d broken a bone and had to go to rehab with the idea that she might not be able to return home on her own. She’s also the kind of person who likes books like the one I was given, so I passed it on. I figured she needed it at that point much more than I did. Looking back, perhaps I should have hung on to it and used it to remind myself this week and during the past months about what I do have to be grateful for…NOW.

          I do not have the capability (damnit anyway) to go back and change a single thing that’s happened in my life. All I can do is let the hurtful memories go and be super thankful for the great ones that remain, and there are tons and tons of those. So, I need to adjust my gratefulness scale. I need to look around myself at all the things and people for whom I am most grateful. I need to take a few minutes at the end of each day, as I used to do, to write down five things that made me grateful that very day. Depending on what they are and how my writing goes, perhaps I’ll even share some of them with all of you.

          And, to get me started, for today, Saturday, I am grateful for:

1.     Rain for giving all my plants a drink without my having to be the waterer.

2.    My garden. Even though it rains, I can sit inside or on the deck under cover and enjoy the beauty that’s the result of my planting and care. There I also find peace and quiet as well as the sound of my water feature and birdsong.

3.    I’ve decided to be grateful for the crap-fest John left behind. It’s given me my granddaughter one day a week for the last couple of months. I so enjoy her delight in the various finds she’s made and lunch always tastes better when you share it with someone. Her organizational skills impress the absolute hell out of me.

4.    The ability to look at my life and choose what I want to cherish and what I want to simply forget or at the very least, to forgive.

5.   I started this post early in the day and now the end of the day has arrived. So, the final grateful for the day is for this blog. It helps me see things more clearly; and I’m very grateful for each and every one of you who take the time to read and comment.