CONFUSION

         It never fails to amaze me how a person can present one façade to you while actually doing something else.  I don’t understand how a person can actually treat you one way, or do things a certain way, and yet, do the exact opposite of what you expect. And, it’s not like you can call them out for what they are doing. It’s very confusing for me.

          I’ve always tried to be up front about everything in my life. I’ve always tried to be honest in my dealings with friends, family or even the odd person who just happens to show up in my life.  I simply don’t understand how a person can say one thing and then do the exact opposite. Maybe I’m simply too naïve and don’t get it.

          I cannot cite any particular persons or occasions here because I would undoubtedly be roasted over an open fire for saying such things or attributing it to a particular person. Thankfully, there haven’t been a huge number of people like this in my life. Also, once the situation became apparent, that person was no longer a part of my life except for exceptional circumstances. It would give me a huge feeling of satisfaction to identify those people, but I simply cannot, without creating an entirely new fiasco.

          And, to be perfectly honest, I do sincerely believe there are some people in my life who do not take me at my word, that choose to believe I have another scenario in mind when it comes top whatever it is I’m working on or discussing.  I don’t understand how their minds work or how they can find fault with me when I’m attempting to be honest and above-board.

          These are the same people who rave about another person or persons who do literally and absolutely nothing for them. I’m here, and I do whatever I can to assist or provide when it comes to needs or wants. I don’t expect huge accolades or effusive thanks, but some form of recognition would be nice. However, me, myself and I are in no way, shape or form, acknowledged by the individuals who go out of their way to thank and approve or provide some form of accolades for the person(s) who doesn’t provide anything in the way of support.

          Seriously, I don’t get it. Why am I not recognized for what I actually do or what I can actually do as opposed to those individuals who do absolutely nothing and yet receive recognition in a huge post or thank you on Facebook, or even a small thank you card.  I realize in some cases that the individual recognizing someone else for basically nothing is trying to get some sort of acknowledgement from the person doing the recognition. So far, from what I’ve seen, it usually doesn’t appear to work.

          Instead, I’m left feeling as though I’m some sort of idiot for trying to be whatever that person wants. I’m left feeling as though my efforts are not recognized or appreciated. It’s at that point I feel as though there’s no point in continuing to try to do whatever I can to assist the person/people in whatever their goals may be.

          Perhaps I’m just at a low point right now and focusing more on the “don’t have” column as opposed to the “have” column. In any case, when it comes to the thankless folks in my life, there aren’t all that many…could probably count on the fingers of one hand. So, it’s best I look at and appreciate all the wonderful people who do inhabit my life and assist me in feeling good the majority of the time.