This is a post
about friendship and a plant. My east coast or Cape Cod best friend is Pam. We
first met when we both worked at the University of Washington. Her husband, Ed,
was getting a degree in Oceanography and she’d been hired as the Department of
Physiology and Biophysics editor. We worked together for about a year or so on
the text book I posted about before.
Pam grew up in New Jersey and how or
why we became best friends, I’ve no idea, but we did. I love her sense of humor
and she must like mine. We also like the same kind of books and movies. When
her husband finished his degree, he was hired by Woods Hole in Massachusetts.
So, she left, but we stayed in touch via letters and cards…no computers in the
1970s. They built a house not too far from the beach and I figured I’d visit
her someday. In 1979 her husband was awarded a year’s sabbatical back here at
the University of Washington. I was so excited to have her close by again, plus
I was pregnant.
Well, big surprise. When Pam arrived
here, she told me she was pregnant too. I’d be having a baby in February (Thor)
and her baby (Alex) would be born the beginning of April. How fun it was to
share this experience. I could hardly stand it when she and her baby and
husband returned to Massachusetts that summer.
Jump ahead a couple of years and John
and I were going east to attend a friend’s school graduation in Baltimore. I
left a few days before John and flew to Boston. It was February with snow and
ice, but her husband came and picked me up. I had a few days with her and her
son before returning to Boston and flying to Baltimore. In fact, I was lucky
her husband was able to get me to the airport, and even luckier that our friend
had a friend with four-wheel drive. The east coast was suffering from the worst
blizzard they’d had in 40-some years.
While I was at Pam’s, I was taken with
this wonderful plant she had. She didn’t know the name, but it was gorgeous.
Jump ahead, I don’t remember how long, and her husband came to Seattle for some
reason or other having to do with oceanography. Thor and I met Ed at McDonalds
in the University District. He had a big black garbage bag for me. He’d carried
it on the plane (couldn’t do that now) and inside was leaves and pieces of the rhizome
from that wonderful plant. I was so excited.
It’s now almost 40 years later and
that plant, Begonia Gigantiosum, still lives in my house. In fact, at the
moment I have five pots of them…it’s the most I’ve ever had at one time. Over
the years, I’ve populated the northwest with this plant. I’ve given it to
family, friends and even took some into the Woodland Park Zoo for the Tropical
Rain Forest. I do warn them, however, that it can get large enough to require
its very own room.
Just now, while writing this, I looked
on the internet to see if I could find this begonia. There are like 1800+
different begonia plants and I couldn’t find mine among the ones listed. I do
know I have the name correct, because when I found it all those years ago, I
thought the name most fitting because it does become as huge as you’ll allow it
to be. I just wish I could remember how and where I found the information…there
was no internet then.
What caused me to write about this
plant and Pam today was the fact it is actually blooming. This is the very first
time I’ve had my begonia bloom like this. Other people, to whom I’ve given the
plant, have had it bloom, but it apparently didn’t like me well enough to bloom
before now…I guess I had to grow on it. Now it is blooming, and while the bloom
isn’t all that attractive, I’m happy it’s happy enough to bloom in my bathroom.
It doesn’t look all that large in the
photo, but by the end of summer, it will take up a huge amount of space in my
bathroom. Fortunately, I’m not terribly
tall and the room has a high ceiling so I don’t run into it. The leaves will be
bigger than my hands put together and the leaf stems can become a half-inch to
an inch in diameter. It looks gorgeous in there and when I sell the house, I
may need to leave the one in the bathroom behind…if the new owners want it.
Unfortunately, the rhizomes also grow
and can become a couple of inches in diameter. Almost every summer, maybe every
other summer, I’ve had to take the plant outside, remove the majority of its leaves,
take it out of the pot and cut it into two or four sections before replanting.
This is why I have so many now…I didn’t find homes for the extras when I did
this last summer.
As I said above, Pam and her family returned
to Massachusetts the summer of 1980. Shortly after, my husband came up with a
stash of tape recorders. I sent one to Pam and rather than writing, we began to
send each other tapes. Sometimes they were 60 minutes, other times 90. Sometimes
we sent or received more than one. Part of my idea was that our boys could talk
to each other when they began talking. That didn’t happen too much, but what a
treat it was to hear my friend’s voice every month or two. Those tape recorders
eventually wore out and we replaced them. I think we stopped sending tapes when
email and cell phones came on line.
I’ve been back to Cape Cod twice more
since the visit in 1982. Thor and I went when he was 10 or 12 years old. Pam’s
library provides passes to a variety of places, so she took us to Plimoth
Plantation, Plymouth Rock, and the Mayflower. We had a great time and the two boys got along famously. They
went wind-sailing together down at the beach, and Thor shared his love of comic
books with Alex.
It
was kinda funny actually having a conversation face-to-face after all the years
of sending tapes. Pam offered to set her timer and after I talked for an hour,
it would be her turn. I went to see her once more on my own after my mother
died. Pam worked every day which was fine because it allowed me the space I
needed for grieving, plus it was so good to see and be with her.
Pam’s
first son was born in Seattle and came back for a job interview some years ago.
It looked like he and his wife might relocate to Seattle, but that didn’t
happen. They’re in Maryland I think. Her youngest son, born in Massachusetts,
did relocate and now lives in Bellingham. Pam came out about a year ago to see
him and his wife, her first trip back here since 1980. It was so good to see
her and I toured them around the zoo and took them to dinner at Ray’s. She was
supposed to come back this spring, but the pandemic has squashed that idea.
These
days, we email back and forth if we have something to say. If we use our cell
phones, it’s not unusual for our conversations to last more than an hour,
sometimes close to two…we don’t set a timer. We’ve talked about doing some
traveling together. I know she loves cruises because she’s done it and didn’t
want to get off the ship. Maybe when all this craziness is over, we can pick a destination
and meet up at some port or another. And, just maybe, I can figure out how to take
her a new Begonia gigantiosium.
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