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Thursday, February 13, 2020

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EARLY


          This evening, about 7:00 pm, will be the 55th anniversary of when John and I met. A woman I worked invited me to dinner so I could meet a friend of her husband. My daddy dropped me off at their house. My feelings were kinda soso because it seemed like the guys I’d been dating for the last while had all been such losers…buy you dinner, take you dancing, whatever; and they wanted payment at the end of the evening. I lived with my parents and was never willing to go to wherever my date suggested we go. I didn’t expect this “date” to go anywhere either.

          When the door was opened, I bent down to keep the dog from leaping and snagging my nylons. Yes, this was ages ago when a woman wore nylons, a girdle, and nice clothes (in my case a blue and white sweater and blue wool skirt) when going out. My eyes began at John’s feet and travelled upward. Nice shoes, khaki slacks, belt, a crisp, patterned short-sleeved shirt. And, then his face, a very nice smile and those eyes…WOW, was all I could think. Don’t know about John, but for me, I think it was love at first site.


          We had dinner and played a card game. When the evening was over, John drove me home. We sat in his car and necked for the longest time. He was the very best kisser, and I think if he’d suggested going to his house, I just might have gone, I was that in love…and maybe lust.

          The next day I was in a tizzy. I waited and waited for him to call and he didn’t. I was sure I’d been too “easy” the night before with all that necking. My mom and grandma had indoctrinated me on how boys want just one thing and that an “easy” girl won’t be called on again. I really liked this guy. I was really attracted to this guy. I wanted him to call and jumped every time the phone rang.

          Just about dinner time, John did finally call. Would I like to go back to our friends and play cards again that night? Boy, would I. And, that was the beginning.

          Over the next few weeks, we talked often on the phone and saw each other as much as possible. One subject we talked about and agreed on was neither of us was looking for a permanent relationship. We just wanted someone to have fun with. In an effort to keep us from becoming too serious, on Friday nights we each did something with other people…Saturday nights were our date night.

          Regardless of our conversations, John showed up at my house with one single long-stemmed red rose to commemorate the occasion of our dating for one-month (3/13). The next month, John showed up with two long-stemmed red roses. He also began to be a bit surly on our Saturday night dates. It took me a couple of times to realize it was because he didn’t like the idea of my going out on Friday nights without him. The third monthaversary, John brought me three red carnations…roses were getting too expensive. That was also the point at which I told him I wouldn’t go out on Friday nights anymore.

          I won’t tell you how long it was before we consummated our relationship. Initially, it was disappointing, but it didn’t take long before we were both enjoying these wonderful interludes. Since I was still living at home and he lived with his mom, we had to become creative in our efforts to be together. Thank heavens for blankets, darkness and Seattle’s many many parks. Thank heavens too for being so young our bodies were supple and being together in John’s car was also one of our chosen, but not exactly favorite places.

          Toward the end of that summer, my daddy accepted a job out of town and so I either had to find an apartment or move with them. I couldn’t leave John. I couldn’t leave my job. I found an apartment within walking distance of my job in Fremont. Being together was no longer a problem. John didn’t move in, but he spent most weekends with me.

          Funny story here. John had lots of friends. Most of those friends didn’t have girlfriends or wives. They all knew where John was, but do you think they would come by my apartment or phone there?  Nope, they’d call John’s mothers and leave messages…after all, we were sinning. When we were married the following year, they showed up the day we arrived home and never really left until they had wives of their own. I basically became their den mother once we were legal.

          It was also toward the end of summer when marriage came up. Not in the way it usually does with a ring and the asker on his knee. Nope, I was in John’s bedroom waiting for him to change his shoes or something. I was looking (snooping) through his bookcase which held a coffee can over half-full of pennies.

          “What are you saving all these pennies for?” I asked.

          “For rings,” he responded.


          “Rings, I thought you just put rings in your car. How often do you have to do that anyway?”

          At that point, John pointed to his ring finger and said, “No, this kind of ring.”

          I guess that was his way of asking me to marry him because he never actually asked “the” question.

          We referred to each other as our “early Valentine’s” during the ensuing years and never actually celebrated Valentine’s Day. We gave each other cards and gifts and candy on February 13th. It was our special day.

          This year before I left on this cruise, I went to See’s and bought myself what John always bought or ordered for me…a box of dark chocolates. Tonight, I’ll sit myself on my verandah with my open box of chocolates and let my memory loose to remember some of the wonderful times we experienced together in the beginning. I look forward to sharing more of those memories with you.


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