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Friday, February 28, 2020

VALUE CAN ONLY BE DETERMINED BY THE OWNER

          Posting about having a garage sale made me think of the first time John and I had a serious argument about something I did without consulting him. I don’t think we’d even been married a year. I know we were living in the little house in Ballard, and it was probably spring because that’s when you do your spring cleaning…right?

          Anyway, I was John’s wife, mistress of his life so why would I need to check with him when I began cleaning out the closet and dresser drawers. I mean, really, it was right there in the marriage vows wasn’t it? What was his is mine and what’s mine is his and those vows endowed me with the power to make decisions about his clothes and stuff. So, I cleaned out his side of the closet as well as mine. I had never been a saver, i.e., if I didn’t wear it or came to dislike it, then it went in the Goodwill box.

          John had this pair of white Levi’s that had been patched innumerable times by his mother. The jeans were more patch than original fabric. At that point I had never owned a pair of Levi’s and had no idea that the longer you had them and wore them, the softer and more comfortable they became. To me, all those patches represented being poor and there was no need for him to keep them since he had other good pairs of jeans. Into the Goodwill box they went.

          John also had an unbelievably ugly mustard-yellow corduroy jacket. He’d put it on once with a red and white patterned shirt…so ugly. It looked horrible and I insisted he wear something else. After all, I was the fashionista, not him. So, since I hated that jacket and couldn’t ever see myself going out in public with him if he was wearing it, into the Goodwill box it went as well.

          The final insult as far as John was concerned was the fact, he took the boxes out of the car trunk and put them into the Goodwill bin. When he found out he’d tossed his favorite jeans and that wonderful jacket into the bin, he was so angry, I’m sure if he could have said, “I divorce thee; I divorce thee; I divorce thee.” and never had to see me again, he just might have done exactly that.

          Since he died last August, I’ve gotten rid of a whole bunch of stuff without asking him if it was okay. I’m sure if he was in a grave, he’d be rolling over and over in an absolute snit. I gave away 25 boxes of Playboy magazines…yes, GAVE away. I took another four or five huge boxes of Maxim magazines to the recycle station. It gave me great pleasure, plus added a lot of steps to my Fitbit that day, to carry and toss those magazines. In the process of cleaning out all those file cabinets, I found a bunch of jewelry that definitely didn’t belong to me. Who knows where it came from? Someone suggested I take it to Bellevue Rare Coins. I did and was very thankful I didn’t toss that stuff into a Goodwill box. The absolute ugliest pieces of jewelry were 18 caret gold…imagine. 

Besides what I did, the boys and I went through a stuff in the garage and then through what he had stored in the extra space he rented. Again, there was so much that didn’t have a value and that ended up in either recycle or the garbage. The eldest son kept saying, “What was dad thinking?”. I certainly didn’t have an answer.

Not too long ago, I read an article written by a woman who had just finished cleaning out her mother’s home. She hired an estate sale company to take care of the whole thing, but learned a number of things. No one is interested in good china or crystal…may as well enjoy tossing it on the floor and breaking it. No one is interested in brown furniture…may as well cut it up for firewood. Apparently, the only items that have any value are good jewelry, firearms, and I cannot remember what the third thing was…maybe sterling silver? I looked for the article, but could not find it again.

So, I guess the absolute best thing would be to order a dumpster (Can you hear John screaming?) and simply begin to fill it with all the stuff in the house, the attic and the garage that isn’t needed or necessary…this would include eliminating as much of my own stuff as possible in the process. I think I’ll have a garage sale first though and see if I can’t make a bit of change from some of it. I figure if I start now and go room by room, pricing and boxing, then it shouldn’t be too hard come the end of July. Then, whatever’s left can go in the dumpster…John, don’t you come haunting me now. 




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